Ellipses (dot dot dot) ...

Here we are...

2006-02-01T13:58:00.000-05:00

More later.

New Blog. Go There.

2005-08-08T16:15:00.000-04:00

Here it is:

http://wheelerjd.blogspot.com

If Crowgey does it, I do it. Plain and peanuts. M&M's. Chocolate. Cocoa. Cocaine. Eric Clapton. Randy Chester. Copperpot. Chester Copperpot. The Goonies. The Boondock Saints. Troy Duffy. Donald Duck. Mickey Mouse. Looney Toons. ... I got nothin'.

Help a brotha out...

2005-07-25T08:49:00.000-04:00

Ok people, here is how you (whoever is reading this) can help me out (on one of my gaming expeditions). Click on the link below, and go to the page and press the number that it tells you to (if you 'fail', back out and try again). That's it. You don't *have* to join or anything. Just click the link once a day (if you can) and click the number.

http://www.mediwar.com/army/22335

If you decide to join; even better. But all's I ask is that you click the link (only once a day).

Thanks!

Hilarious!

2005-07-20T15:30:00.000-04:00

I have found the craziest group (or maybe she is just one) of Christians ever. Check out THIS. Craziness.

This kind of stuff makes me laugh. Hard. The following is from the website:

----------------------------------------------------
BOYCE and BOICE are two demons that interfere with any electronic equipment, i.e., phone, computer, printer, automibile.

If something malfunctions, BIND UP these two demons, and command them to leave your equipment, in the name of Jesus.

Here is an incoming email received February 9, 2001: "Hi, Just thought I'd let you know it took me all these hours to run off your complete deliverance manual. My computer kept shutting down, the connection to the internet kept shutting off, I got signs coming up this is an illegal action, you probably have heard all this before, but the devil sure didn't want me to get hold of your material....I thought there has to be some good stuff in here if the devil is this mad.....as soon as I finished running if off, my computer is working perfect...not shutting down,....not getting unconnected. Praise Jesus, He's stronger than any devil. I had to keep taking authority over devils to get the manual printed, even the printer tried to jam up. What a praise report....really. Devil you loose!!!Praise the Lord. Thank you for your web site. Blessings"

----------------------------------------------------

For the love of all that's holy and good. And you know what? Apparently over 3 million peeps have visited that site.

Scary

Theological Quiz guy

2005-07-19T12:51:00.000-04:00

I'm Anselm. Who's that?

"Anselm is the outstanding theologian of the medieval period.He sees man's primary problem as having failed to render unto God what we owe him, so God becomes man in Christ and gives God what he is due. You should read 'Cur Deus Homo?'"

Ok.

What I'm reading:
'The Secret Societies Handbook' by Michael Bradley
'Church History In Plain Language' by Bruce L. Shelley

What I'm listening to:
Brad Mehldau - 'Live in Tokyo'
Nick Drake - 'Five Leaves Left'

What I'm watching:
CSI - so awesome
Twilight Zone - old ones in b/w on sci-fi

What I'm playing:
Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas - beat it Sunday and still can't stop playing it!

Win Ben Stein

2005-07-08T14:27:00.000-04:00

My blog post today is Ben Stein's last article for E!Online, published 12/20/03. I never read this until today, and it is a pretty awesome article. I don't apologize for length.

-Jon

---------------------------------------------

How Can Someone Who Lives in Insane Luxury Be a Star in Today's World?

As I begin to write this, I "slug" it, as we writers say, which means I put a heading on top of the document to identify it. This heading is "eonlineFINAL," and it gives me a shiver to write it. I have been doing this column for so long that I cannot even recall when I started.

Lew Harris, who founded this great site, asked me to do it maybe seven or eight years ago, and I loved writing this column so much for so long I came to believe it would never end.

But again, all things must pass, and my column for E! Online must pass. In a way, it is actually the perfect time for it to pass. Lew, whom I have known forever, was impressed that I knew so many stars at Morton's on Monday nights.

He could not get over it, in fact. So, he said I should write a column about the stars I saw at Morton's and what they had to say.

It worked well for a long time, but gradually, my changing as a person and the world's change have overtaken it. On a small scale, Morton's, while better than ever, no longer attracts as many stars as it used to. It still brings in the rich people in droves and definitely some stars.

I saw Samuel L. Jackson there a few days ago, and we had a nice visit, and right before that, I saw and had a splendid talk with Warren Beatty in an elevator, in which we agreed that Splendor in the Grass was a super movie.

But Morton's is not the star galaxy it once was, though it probably will be again.

Beyond that, a bigger change has happened. I no longer think Hollywood stars are terribly important. They are uniformly pleasant, friendly people, and they treat me better than I deserve to be treated. But a man or woman who makes a huge wage for memorizing lines and reciting them in front of a camera is no longer my idea of a shining star we should all look up to.

How can a man or woman who makes an eight-figure wage and lives in insane luxury really be a star in today's world, if by a "star" we mean someone bright and powerful and attractive as a role model?

Real stars are not riding around in the backs of limousines or in Porsches or getting trained in yoga or Pilates and eating only raw fruit while they have Vietnamese girls do their nails. They can be interesting, nice people, but they are not heroes to me any longer.

A real star is the soldier of the 4th Infantry Division who poked his head into a hole on a farm near Tikrit, Iraq. He could have been met by a bomb or a hail of AK-47 bullets. Instead, he faced an abject Saddam Hussein and the gratitude of all of the decent people of the world.

A real star is the U.S. soldier who was sent to disarm a bomb next to a road north of Baghdad. He approached it, and the bomb went off and killed him.

A real star, the kind who haunts my memory night and day, is the U.S. soldier in Baghdad who saw a little girl playing with a piece of unexploded ordnance on a street near where he was guarding a station. He pushed her aside and threw himself on it just as it exploded. He left a family desolate in California and a little girl alive in Baghdad.

The stars who deserve media attention are not the ones who have lavish weddings on TV but the ones who patrol the streets of Mosul even after two of their buddies were murdered and their bodies battered and stripped for the sin of trying to protect Iraqis from terrorists.

We put couples with incomes of $100 million a year on the covers of our magazines. The noncoms and officers who barely scrape by on military pay but stand on guard in Afghanistan and Iraq and on ships and in submarines and near the Arctic Circle are anonymous as they live and die.

I am no longer comfortable being a part of the system that has such poor values, and I do not want to perpetuate those values by pretending that who is eating at Morton's is a big subject.

There are plenty of other stars in the American firmament. The policemen and women who go off on patrol in South Central and have no idea if they will return alive. The orderlies and paramedics who bring in people who have been in terrible accidents and prepare them for surgery. The teachers and nurses who throw their whole spirits into caring for autistic children. The kind men and women who work in hospices and in cancer wards.

Think of each and every fireman who was running up the stairs at the World Trade Center as the towers began to collapse.

Now you have my idea of a real hero.

Last column, I told you a few of the rules I had learned to keep my sanity. Well, here is a final one to help you keep your sanity and keep you in the running for stardom: We are puny, insignificant creatures.

We are not responsible for the operation of the universe, and what happens to us is not terribly important. God is real, not a fiction, and when we turn over our lives to Him, he takes far better care of us than we could ever do for ourselves.

In a word, we make ourselves sane when we fire ourselves as the directors of the movie of our lives and turn the power over to Him.

I can put it another way. Years ago, I realized I could never be as great an actor as Olivier or as good a comic as Steve Martin--or Martin Mull or Fred Willard--or as good an economist as Samuelson or Friedman or as good a writer as Fitzgerald. Or even remotely close to any of them.

But I could be a devoted father to my son, husband to my wife and, above all, a good son to the parents who had done so much for me. This came to be my main task in life.

I did it moderately well with my son, pretty well with my wife and well indeed with my parents (with my sister's help). I cared for and paid attention to them in their declining years. I stayed with my father as he got sick, went into extremis and then into a coma and then entered immortality with my sister and me reading him the Psalms.

This was the only point at which my life touched the lives of the soldiers in Iraq or the firefighters in New York. I came to realize that life lived to help others is the only one that matters and that it is my duty, in return for the lavish life God has devolved upon me, to help others He has placed in my path. This is my highest and best use as a human.

As so many of you know, I am an avid Bush fan and a Republican. But I think the best guidance I ever got was from the inauguration speech of Democrat John F. Kennedy in January of 1961.

On a very cold and bright day in D.C., he said, "With a good conscience our only sure reward, with history the final judge of our deeds, let us go forth...asking His blessing and His help but knowing that here on Earth, God's work must surely be our own."

And then to paraphrase my favorite president, my boss and friend Richard Nixon, when he left the White House in August 1974, with me standing a few feet away, "This is not goodbye. The French have a word for it--au revoir. We'll see you again."

Au revoir, and thank you for reading me for so long. God bless every one of you. We'll see you again.

-Ben Stein, E!Online. Entire article can be found here: http://www.eonline.com/Gossip/Morton/Archive/2003/031220.html

mr. procrastinator. (second cousin to mr. roboto)

2005-07-05T17:07:00.000-04:00

you know, i don't think it's really possible for someone to think for themselves. since everything is a learning process, everything we know is because someone taught us...even if they taught us indifference.

btw, i'm not changing my blog address. i forgot to care.

Blog Address Change

2005-06-23T11:26:00.000-04:00

I've decided to move away from http://allfiguresout.blogspot.com. Instead, I will try to find an address that either uses my name or something that is easy to remember and say.

I don't know why I picked that in the first place, but I don't like it anymore. The new address will be http://wheelerjd.blogspot.com. I'll eventually just move everything over there (if I can).

Anyway... here's an interesting apologetics site that I peruse infrequently: http://www.carm.org.

BTW, I can't get any "href's" to work on here. It keeps on clearing out my code in the preview, and when I post, it's gone. If anyone has any suggestions, help a brotha out.

Joke of the day

2005-06-21T15:21:00.000-04:00

So there's this guy, and he's got a giant orange for a head. He walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender at first pretends he doesn't notice, but after a while, curiosity gets the better of him and he asks, "Hey do you mind if I ask, how did you end up with a giant orange for a head?"

The guy says, "well, it's a bit of a long story, but I don't mind telling."

"Ok", says the bartender.

"Well, I was cleaning out my attic one day, and I came across a lamp. As I brushed the dirt off it to get a better look, a genie came out and offered me three wishes!"

"No way," says the bartender. "So what'd you wish for?"

"First, I wished for a wallet with a million dollars in it. And no matter how much of the money I spent, there would always be a million dollars in there."

"Did it work?"

"Yep, I'm a rich man!" The man pulled out his wallet and showed the bartender the money. Amazed, the bartender blinked for a second, then leaned in and asked, "What was your second wish?"

"That every woman I met would feel the same level of attraction to me as I felt towards her," said the man.

"Wow, that's a great wish!" exclaimed the bartender. "Did it work?"

"Oh yeah," said the man. "When I don't like a woman, she doesn't like me, but every woman I'm attracted to falls head over heels for me."

By now the bartender is beside himself with excitement and anticipation. With wide eyes, he stage-whispers, "WHAT WAS YOUR THIRD WISH?"

The man leans back in his chair, looks at the bartender, and says,

"Why, that I would have a giant orange for a head!"

Site of the moment...

2005-06-15T12:55:00.000-04:00

I'll let you peruse the site at your leisure. Makes me feel so warm inside that Pharisees are alive and well. At least read the section for CS Lewis.

In other news...my current music ratings for albums that are out:

Coldplay - X and Y: 7 (out of 10)
Foo Fighters - In Your Honor: 7.5
Audioslave - Out of Exile: 9

My opinions may change about the first two but the Audioslave album is one of the best I've heard in a WHILE. Maybe a few years.

Peace

Two Words...

2005-06-14T08:16:00.000-04:00

NOT GUILTY.

Thank God. I, unlike many Christian Americans (suprise, suprise), am happy he was found not guilty on all counts. Not only do I not think there was enough evidence to convict (to PROVE guilty), I think it's bad enough that his career is almost ruined and he's suffered so much emotionally.

But to all you "nay-sayers", read the headlines...

Up yours!

One more thing, the best album out right now is Audioslave's "Out of Exile". Goodness, it's awesome.

MP3 Player

2005-06-01T11:42:00.000-04:00

Ok, i've finally decided to get one. What do you guys/girls recommend? I know a lot of you who read this blog have them, so I want your opinions/reviews/recommendations.

Give me some pros and cons, and what to look for. I'm going to go to some review sites, but I wanted my friends' firsthand thoughts as well.

I've narrowed it down to three. The following is from a PCMag review, which I found very helpful.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Rio Carbon
PRICE: $145.00 - $285.00
Player Type: Hard Disk
Radio: No
Recording, Voice: Yes
Recording, FM: No
Recording, Line In: No
Supported File Types: MP3, WMA
Battery Life: 1186 min
Capacity: 5120 MB
Dimensions: 3.2 x 2.4 x 0.6 inches
Weight: 3.2 oz

Bottom Line:
The Rio Carbon is a worthy competitor to the iPod mini, with a gigabyte more storage, great style, excellent sound, and extras such as voice recording and a built-in stopwatch. It charges via USB and doesn't need a driver or dedicated software.

Pros:
Sleek 5GB player with great sound and ergonomics. Supports Audible audio books and includes extras such as a stopwatch and voice recorder. Exceptional battery life.
Cons:
Static sound with some headphones. Won't play WMA lossless format. Carrying case protects well but covers controls; no belt clip. Minor menu navigation irritations.

Creative Zen Micro
PRICE: $179.00 - $444.00
Player Type: Hard Disk
Radio: Yes
Recording, Voice: Yes
Recording, FM: Yes
Recording, Line In: No
Supported File Types: MP3, WAV, WMA
Battery Life: 720 min
Battery Type: Rechargeable
Screen Size: 160 x 104 pixels
Capacity: 5000 MB
Dimensions: 3.3 x 2 x .7 inches
Weight: 3.8 oz

Bottom Line:
The Zen Micro is the first small player to offer a serious challenge to the iPod Mini. It delivers an outstanding collection of features at an attractive price.

Pros:
Small and stylish player. Bright screen, excellent audio performance, and interesting extras (such as Outlook synchronization).

Cons:
Creative's software is still somewhat clunky (but Windows Media Player 10 saves the day). Fringe FM reception is weak.

Archos Gmini XS200
PRICE: $190.00 - $239.00
Player Type: Hard Disk
Radio: No
Recording, Voice: No
Recording, FM: No
Recording, Line In: No
Supported File Types: MP3, WAV, WMA
Battery Life: 614 min
Battery Type: Rechargeable
Screen Size: 128 x 128 pixels
Capacity: 20480 MB
Dimensions: 3 x 2.3 x .8 inches
Weight: 4.3 oz

Bottom Line:
A fine, affordable player with minimal features but giant-killing performance.

Pros:
Compact 20GB player, excellent audio performance, attractively priced.

Cons:
Doesn't support lossless compression.

----------------------------------------------------------------

I'm really looking at the Rio Carbon. The only thing it doesn't have that I *kinda* want is radio. But the price is right, and so is the capacity. I'm not too sure what "lossless compression" is or how important it is (i could look it up, but again...lazy), so if you want to fill me in, that's cool.

And no Levi, I don't want an IPod.

My SouthPark Character

2005-05-20T12:40:00.000-04:00

I'm not endorsing Southpark...I for one think it's tasteless, unfunny, and sacriligious. But I do like this game thing I found that you can use to create your own SouthPark character.

Here's mine:

Create yours here.

Good times.

Here's something profound, well kinda...

2005-05-09T20:47:00.000-04:00

When we signed up for this whole Christian thing, it was like enlisting in a war; there's always going to be some battle. And when we are faced with a battle, we have two options: to fight, or to admit defeat and give up.

The problem is this: If Hell is a place for those who reject the Truth, and by giving up we are giving in to the temptation/battle (and thus rejecting the Truth that "sets us free"), then by giving up we are readily rejecting the Truth, and that makes us worthy of Hell, or actually readily ACCEPTING Hell.

My point is: We can never really give up. We can, and I have...but not for long. Giving up makes you grow weary. You would think fighting would, but that actually makes you stronger. You want to give up because when you give in every now and then, you feel guilty because of it and say "How could a God who is perfect and demand perfection tolerate a being that cannot give perfection? How can I live up to that? It's a battle that defeats me...almost like a personal Hell." But the real Hell is when you finally throw in the towel...THAT'S when the Hell begins.

So don't do it. Give up, that is. Just think of the graph where there is a curved line: the line dips, then peaks, then dips again, but always gets higher and higher...like a river flowing uphill. That's how are spiritual lives are...same old thing, different day.

In summation...we have to keep fighting. Our life is the fight; our very being. As cliche as it sounds (and probably unoriginal) it is nevertheless true. And something we need to be reminded of.

As I have.

Music is cool.

2005-05-03T09:11:00.000-04:00

This past weekend was awesome (most of it). We practiced some Friday, some Saturday, and I feel it paid off. It was the best show I've played with JP. Lots of energy, lots of fun...etc. etc. We pulled off the new song almost perfect.

I was a little worried that I was going to be the loose end...seeing as I haven't played rock-n-roll that long. It was the first time that i was in the "zone". To a musician, this means being so into the music that you aren't thinking about what you are singing or playing. You just "are". Mmmm...music smells so sweet.

I saw Copeland and Anberlin last night. I had VERY high hopes. Especially for Anberlin (one of my fave bands). On a scale of 1-10, I gave (based on last night's performance): Anberlin = 8, Copeland = 7. Not as impressed as I thought I would be. Anberlin wasn't as tight as I expected and Copeland wasn't as fun. I left during Copeland's 7th song. It was so loud I'm pretty sure I permanently damaged my hearing. I'm not kidding.

Either way, I'm listening to Coldplay right now. So I'm happy. I like most of what I've heard from them. "Nobody said it was easy..."

...

LTTAGO
Some things just never go away...
Bought "Guild Wars", a groundbreaking new MMORPG. I will be at my computer if you need me.
I love my old EC friends...I have so many. And some new ones (you know who you are).
The Oracle is an awesome band. Ian, Michael, and James are my new heros.
I hope to have a nephew soon...
I want to live alone.
I'm a terrible Christian...still. Dang it.

If I had 90-90 hindsight...

2005-04-22T18:58:00.000-04:00

For this blog post, I am just writing down a whole bunch of Bushisms. Now, I don't hate the President, but these are just funny. The subject of this post is one, by the way (Not Dubya though; his dad).

--------------------------------------------

"I hope we get to the bottom of the answer."

"There has been a lot of speculation, and I believe there will continue to be a lot of speculation until the speculation ends."

"I understand small business growth. I was one."

"There's no such thing as legaciess. At least, there is a legacy, but I'll never see it." -visiting Catholic leaders at the White House

"Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream."

"People shouldn't read into venue violations someone's heart."

"Actually, I--this may sound a little West Texan to you, but I like it. When I'm talking about--when I'm talking about myself, and when he's talking about me, all of us are talking about me." -During an appearance on MSNBC's Hardball

75-70

2005-04-05T12:18:00.000-04:00

One thing to say.

UNC!

The boys are back.

Five-Star Songs

2005-03-09T18:45:00.000-05:00

So I'm just sitting at work, finishing up my Wednesday, listening to some music. I was thinking, "I should update my blog, since I receive daily harassment from Amber and JJ." So here goes. Or something.

I love music. I don't adhere to a particular scene, in fact I hate the scenes, at least now. I used to be all about grunge in high school, and the Christian hard rock scene at EC. But now, I like all kinds.

I was introduced to black gospel and smooth jazz my first couple of years at EC, and now I love it. At least the really good artists/songs. I love just about all types of music (except hard-core gangsta rap and annoying punk), but I am like my friend Crowgey, I really only like the best artists that the genre has to offer. Best in my opinion.

Enough of that...I'm going to list my current 5-star rated songs that are on my work computer. This isn't my whole music collection though, just what I have *ahem* ripped to my computer at work and rated 5-stars in Windows Media Player.

Let me preface. These songs have to have one of the following characteristics, and please go ahead and make fun of me...but I get really moved by some songs. Sometimes to tears. Some songs remind me of something I have experienced, or have dreamed of, or inspire new dreams. I don't know. Anyway, here are the qualifications:

1) Make me tear up and I don't know why, the song is just beautiful (musically)

2) The lyrics are so pounding that I tear up, or feel really moved

3) The music is so original or interesting that I...oh whatever, some adjective here.

Here's the list:

Anberlin - Cadence
Anberlin - Naive Orleans
Blindside - Pitiful
Brad Mehldau - River Man
Climber - Hurt Mutant
Climber - Robot & Running
Colin Hay - Overkill
Common Children - Whisper
Common Children - Strange Rain
Copeland - California
Darrell Evans - I Know
Dave Matthews Band - The Dreaming Tree
Dirty Vegas - Lost Not Found
dZihan & Kamien Orchestra - Airport [Live]
Elliott Smith - Angeles
Elliott Smith - Miss Misery
Embodyment - Segue Station
Foo Fighters - Come Back
Fred Hammond - A Closer Walk
Fred Hammond - Thank You Lord (For Being There For Me)
Israel & New Breed - Holy
John Mayer - Break Away (w/ Matt Mangano)
God's Property - It's Rainin'
Mariah Carey - Can't Let Go (acoustic version)
Pax 217 - Fly Away
Phil Collins - Take Me Home
Phil Keaggy - Icicles
Radiohead - Idioteque
Seal - Crazy
Seal - Human Beings
Simon & Garfunkel - Scarborough Fair/Canticle
Stavesacre - Acquiesce
Stone Temple Pilots - Wonderful
Stone Temple Pilots - A Song for Sleeping
Tears for Fears - Break it Down Again
The Normals - What I Cannot Earn
Twothirtyeight - Moving Too Far
U2 - Where the Streets Have No Name

Later on, I may go back and put in parentheses which category(s) belong to which songs, but not now. I have 20 minutes left at work.

Really good news...

2005-02-23T11:46:00.000-05:00

"Korn guitarist Brian "Head" Welch has parted ways with the hard rock act, citing a recent religious awakening, Billboard.com reports. Korn's website states it a bit more explicitly saying, "Korn has parted ways with guitarist Brian Head Welch, who has chosen the Lord Jesus Christ as his savior, and will be dedicating his musical pursuits to that end." Welch announced that he would be appearing at a local church on Feb. 27 to share his story ... " - Relevantmagazine.com

Well that was unexpected. It just goes to show you never know who is seeking. He joins the ranks of MA$E and Alice Cooper. Good stuff.

Went to Anna McBath's (now Conner) wedding this past weekend. I have never seen so many tattoos and piercings at a wedding before. Emo kids are so funny. They can 80's dance like no other. I'm serious.

I got to see my brother and his wife (and her 14 month old nephew). Got to see Cassie, Mel, Guy, Dusty, Marlaina (sp?), Taylor, Randy, McKenzie, Richard, and Smokey. Good times.

I'm hungry.

U2 is a really great band. I thank Barrett for introducing me to their awesomeness. He has a live DVD that has them doing Sunday Bloody Sunday. It's awesome live, especially in that version.

Okay, back to work...

"LTTAGO"
Listening to U2 - Red Hill Mining Town. Interesting.
I dream of warm weather.
Dave is back! I like Dave. We will have wings in a fortnight. Or a thricenight.
I have added several blogs to my read-list. Now I have to figure out how to add them to the HTML on the side bar there. Hmm. *cries for help*
I'm hungry.
Anyone notice that the blog thing is in full force? Everyone is doing it. It has redeemable value, though, so I'm not complaining.
I have weird dreams. They embarrass me.
LAN party in 9 days! w00t!
Easter Vacation in 29 days! w00t!
Listening to "saxajazz". teehee.

More from an ex-nickname guy

2005-02-09T08:24:00.000-05:00

I've decided to postpone my "story" thing. I have to be in a certain mood to write it, and I just haven't had the time to be in that mood. Oh well.

So I shaved all the hair off my head. Again. It was looking rather nice on the sides...but thin as aluminum foil on the top. And, I had a nice hair-hole up there which must have scared people as the walked up behind me. So off it is. I look like a white peach. I like it.

I don't really have anything interesting to tell...let me see if I have any propaganda to spread. WAIT! Something just happened as I was writing this. One of the managers came over and made fun of my Star Wars Republic Commando desktop wallpaper (or as stupid people say, "screensaver". ugh.). So anyway, he mistakenly compared the helmet of the commando to Boba Fett's helmet. Makes me mad. They are nothing alike. Bah.

I'm drinking water that has been on my desk for two days. Is that bad? Will something happen to me? Physically? I hope not.

Christian stuff, Christian stuff. Hmmm... Nope. Nothing. Maybe next time.

The album of the day is "Seal: Best of 1991-2004". Fantastic. I was never a Seal fan until I borrowed some of Jason Crowgey's CD's at EC one day, and I was sold. If you are thinking, "I hate that Kiss from a Rose song", I would like to say that I do as well. But there are other awesome songs on there. It's kinda cool, if you are an all around fan of UK stuff. It's like, UK R&B, with less "B" and a nice, peppery "R". I like.

Ok, Barrett says "ION" for In Other News, but I say "LTTAGO"...for Little Things That Are Going On. Much easier to remember.

"LTTAGO"
Work sucks.
I'm tired. Tried to stay up and play with Barrett's new toy, but almost passed out.
I love new toys.
My head is cold a lot. I wear an Audio Adrenaline beanie I stole from Lance a few years back.
I miss Lance, Baysden, Strap, Paul, Ian, Bradley, Josh, Crowgey. Good friends are hard to come by.
So I'm really mad at my wife; she hasn't found me yet. Irritating.
Listening to "Air" by Sparta. Neat.
I'm out.

Okay, okay...

2005-01-26T13:08:00.000-05:00

I know I said I would post "soon", but "soon" is relative. What I wanted to post is "my story", basically, the summation of my problems when I was a kid and how God finally came through. I will post eventually, but my job has just really been stressing me out lately so I haven't made the effort.

If "my story" interests anyone, let me know by replying (I also want to see how many of my friends actually read this thing). Some of you may know bits and pieces, but I figured I'd go ahead and get the whole thing out of the way. I'll warn you know though, it may be a little sappy and have some Christianese in it, but así es la vida, or mine anyways.

I'm going to steal my roommates' ideas for the end of blog posts (Levi and Barrett). They put little sentences that describe different aspects of how they feel at the time. It's pretty cool. Here's my first shot.

Listening to Lakewood Live, good stuff.
Hungry as hello deli. Thanks Rupert Jee.
Work sucks.
I have weird dreams...don't ask though, or ye be afraid.
I love new friends: Sarah, Jenn, Ben, Levi, and Brian.
I'm German.
Mongolian BBQ is food of the gods.
Listening to Jag.

Here's to hope

2005-01-08T11:18:00.000-05:00

I know I haven't posted in awhile, but I needed time to gather my thoughts, and I finally have. I know I'm not predestined to go to Hell. The night after I posted that, I was lying in bed, thinking about God. Thinking, "If there is no way I can be a Christian, then my life is truly hopeless." I can't live with such hopelessness. That feeling is much, MUCH more depressing that not "performing" as a Christian.

Then something occured to me. There are things that have happened to me that I can only attribute to a higher power. And if I was "predestined" to go to hell, why would He bother? That would be pretty sick and demented; fooling someone into thinking you cared for them but them sending them to a horrible afterlife. And I know that that DIRECTLY conflicts with God's character. That is a characteristic of Satan, not God. And I will NEVER attribute things of Satan to things of God. Or vice versa.

So if He cares for me, and I'm not going to Hell, then...what? I'm a Christian? I am?? The thing is, religion was telling me otherwise. RELIGION was telling me I had to have it together. That I couldn't screw up. RELIGION - the antithesis of Jesus Christ. Religion forces you to "perform". If you don't "perform", you feel hopeless, like I did. But don't let religion come between you and God. Having that knowledge has driven me closer. And it's a very hopeful feeling.

By the way, check back soon, the next post will have something very interesting. I promise.

Well...

2004-12-03T13:37:00.000-05:00

I have come to a terrible realization. I have realized that for the last 15 years or so I have been fooling myself. I am not what I say I am. I am not who my mother thinks I am. I am what I condemn. For years I have said things about people who call themselves Christians but act like "hell". I am that person. I have horrible things inside of me that I have tried all my life to suppress. I have come to a terrible realization.

I'm not a Christian. I don't even know what that really means. Oh, I know what you think it means. To be Christ like. Christ is your perfection. Well, I am nowhere near Christlike. And I know you would say "that's good! we are not supposed to be perfect!". But the thing is, I suppress who I really am in hopes that I will fool myself and others into thinking I am this other person. Well, I tire of that. I'm getting weary from it. I have realized that I am a horrible person. A bad excuse for someone who is "striving for righteousness". I don't think I know what that means.

Here's the deal. Let me reiterate. I am trying desperately to not be something that I am. It's annoying, and very painful to try to be something you are not. And when you realize you have been fooling yourself and everyone else all these years, it's very depressing. I'm sorry that so many people believe me to be a "good" person. I'm not. And I'm very, very tired of trying to be "holy", or "righteous"...or perfect...or what-have-you. I just want to be myself. I may hate my real self, but I am tired of trying to not be myself. It sucks.

So what does all of this mean? Well, I have not "renounced my faith". I believe in the God of the Bible, I believe that Jesus is the Son of God. I believe that he was crucified so that we may live forever. I really do believe all that. But I believe that I am pre-destined to go to Hell. I have never succeeded in becoming what a Christian should. Unless, of course, every Christian in the world is in the same predicament that I am. If they are, then they do a much better job at hiding than I do. And it pisses me off that they would tell me that they are doing "okay". If the people that believe in "predestination" are correct, then I fit the bill of someone who is "destined" to go the the 'other place'. I know what the Truth is, and I believe it, I just know now that I will never be a Christian.

I have come to a terrible realization.

eBlog

2004-11-12T08:23:00.000-05:00

You know what annoys me (amongst other things: people who drive around a parking lot for 5 minutes trying to find the "perfect" place to park, when there is a parking place open 10 spaces away, but they are too good for it; people who go in the "exit" door; people who make kissing sounds in your house, watching tv, while you are right behind them; people who change lanes in the intersection; there's more, but I'm done for now)?

What annoys me is companies that name their products "e-something". E-mail is the original, and should stay that way. Now, everything is "e-Cards", "e-Post Office", "e-Market", "e-Cardealer". WHY?! Why, why, why-why-why? Don't they know it's stupid and annoying? Almost as bad as that "can you hear me now?" guy.

Ok, I'm done. Back to work.

Gay stuff and poverty...my stance

2004-11-10T18:40:00.000-05:00

Today's message is comprised of two posts I made to a couple threads in the Relevant Magazine website, http://www.relevantmagazine.com/, on a thread about homosexuality and one on the past election regarding social programs and the liberal stance on moral issues.

Read and post comments please!

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First off...please don't read this with the "voice-over" in your head that would sound angry, or aggressive. I dislike how on message boards or chat you can read things without regard to the mood the writer may have been in (because there normally isn't a way to know). So right now, imagine this: a kind of heavy-set white guy at a computer, tapping away whilst taking sips of water, smiling and listening to Elliott Smith. Okay...now read.

The reason why the thought of homosexual Christians is "threatening" to me is because I don't believe that it is something that God approves of. I believe that it is spoken against in the NT, as well as the OT. Plus, the union between man and wife and the Biblical views that play off of that sacred union make me believe that more.

That said, a homosexual Christian, to me, is in the same boat as a Christian who habitually lies, looks at pornography, hates his neighbor, does not honor his parents...i.e. any Christian who knowingly sins. I believe it is a sin, thus, someone who knowingly sins (with out remorse or repentance) and claims Christianity may very well need to make sure they are right with God.

I know that God changes people at His pace, not necessarily ours, but if I have the outstanding belief that homosexuality is abnormal and *is* a sin, then I guess I do feel "threatened" by someone who claims Christianity but has no problem with homosexuality. I would say the same for a friend who was drunk every night, but didn't have a problem with it. Or someone that uses a laser/radar detector to escape the law of the land (speeding), or people who have no problem with what I call "booty dancing", i.e. clubbing and that which goes along with it.

Sin is sin. Cliche, cliche. But you asked...so I spilled the beans. These are just the opinions of a "Good 'ole Boy" from North Carolina. I love people; I don't hate. But the above are the things that I really believe. You may have different opinions, and that's fine. :) Just don't let that interfere with what we are here for. And I'm sure you can get that from one of the other message boards.

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I care about the poor, I just believe welfare and social programs beat down the poor, not raise them up. It's like saying it's okay not to try, because we have this jacked up system that will pay you to have ten kids and not work. I don't think the democrats welfare answer is the answer we need.

So that said, whenever anyone whines "Abortion and homosexuality be damned, what about the war on poverty?", I ask them, why not give grants to faith based initiatives so they can do what Jesus commanded (i.e. help the poor), and take it out of the goverments hands. Let's not make welfare and social security federal programs. Or health care for that matter. I think, don't wholly privatize social security but at least don't rely completely on the gov for it. As it stands now, the baby boomers are paying the senior citizen's social security, but when the boomers are the seniors, who will pay theirs? GenX? Hmmm...I think the fraction of a check my grandfather gets now will dwarf what I get in 50 years.

I don't think that health care will be better if it's "free" for everyone. It will not be quality health care, it will be barely passable and those who have more money will STILL get better health care. We will just be wasting money on a false hope. Ignorant, I say.

What's the point in this rant? Well, to point out why I don't vote Democrat. Liberals, on the most part, want health care for all (Kerry), more goverment regulations in the social programs (health, social security, welfare)...but they are pro-choice and pro-homosexual ammendments. I have reasons behind what I believe about abortion and homosexuality and those are reflected on this board time and time again (though, I must say that I am undecided on a few aspects of handling them, I don't think we should completely mandate certain issues by the government, rather, leave it in the hands of the states). But the response to those 2 moral issues is ALWAYS a whine about social programs and the war in Iraq.

Well, I have responded to the social programs aspect, but I am actually undecided on the war issue. Which is why I'm a centrist. :)

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That's it. Drink plenty of water. At least 10 cups a day.

I'm a Hallo-wiener

2004-10-29T17:50:00.000-04:00

So...I bought a gorilla costume last night. It's worth probably a FIFTH of what I paid for it. But that's what I get for purchasing one in season, 3 days before Halloween. I put it on, went to Walmart, and started towards the fruit and vegetable section. I grabbed a few bananas and went to the self-checkout line. Barrett was there with me, and said that some people were cracking up and some, mainly older people, were just ignoring me. Then I "realized" I didn't bring my wallet, so I took the bananas back. Then I skipped out...yes, skipped. Gorillas get happy too, you know. I wish I had peripheral vision in the suit, but I don't. It's just really hot with no ventilation. Sucks. But worth the money.

We had a costume contest today at work. It was pretty much a VERY informal party all day. I was dressed up as a go-rilla for chrissakes. There were zombies, a hockey player, hippies, bloody-type people, an escaped convict, martha stewart, the "she bang, she bang" guy, and a kid in an airplane. Good stuff.

I didn't win, but I'm okay with that. I'm satisfied that I got to eat pizza (which has made me sick, ugh) and listen to LOUD music all day. At one point, my manager and I turned up "We want the funk" and were dancing in the cubicle aisles. Ah, to have a video camera. By the way, moonwalking on carpet in tennis shoes is not easy. At all.

Whelp!

What is man...

2004-10-28T08:26:00.000-04:00

You know, I was thinking something last night. You know we had that lunar eclipse...so I was checking it out, outside, by myself. I was lookin all around at the night sky, all the little flickering dots, or stars, I guess. And then, like a (can't think of anything more creative because I'm not a writer) train it hit me. What the heck? WHY the heck is God mindful of is? What is man that God is mindful of him? Why does he want to keep us around?

I mess up...every day I do something stupid. I mess up, and then I feel guilty and I don't want to talk to God about it. I don't want to because I feel guilty. Now, I know that it doesn't come from God...but my point is...heck I don't know. I condemn myself.

I'm torn between two ideas. One is, God's grace covers us (cliche, I know). Jesus died so we live, right? I have eternal life. I am a Christian. BUT...but but but: We can't just sin all the time, can we? I mean, if we keep screwing up, if I keep screwing up, my mind tells me that I will LOSE my salvation (and, certain denominational doctrines agree). I just don't know. It seems like a scare tactic to me, although according to people who agree there is scripture to back it up (but you know you can always "find" scripture to back something up).

Anyway, I think that all of the latter ideas point to EARNING one's salvation. I don't know...I could be wrong. Probably am. Someone point me in the right direction. Doesn't help that I can't concentrate...it's 8:25am and I'm listening to Paranoid Android. "...rain down on me...God loves his children..."

Radiohead Rocks.

The Lottery

2004-10-27T13:04:00.000-04:00

I want to talk about the lottery. I'm afraid that I won't win any money. I mean, the odds are like 1 in, say, 15 million that I would win, but they are still odds. Say I invested $100 in tickets/plays, what would be the chance that I would win then? Is it worth all the money to invest in something so risky all for the sake of the education system? I mean, how much money really goes to public education?

Well, I probably won't win anything MAINLY because I haven't bought a ticket (and I won't). But wish me luck anyway. If I win the lottery (without buying a ticket) I GUARANTEE every reader that I will give them half.

That makes SOOO much sense it makes my head spin just trying to understand what I am talking about.

The First

2004-10-26T14:46:00.000-04:00

I'm such a loser. Not really. No, I am just typing this at work. I'm not a loser though, I promise.

Oh yeah, welcome to my blog! I've never done a blog before; I'm a blog newbie. So what do I do? Just type a bunch of words? I can do that!

No, my name is Jonathan Wheeler. I'm 25, a Scorpio (not that that matters at all, personally I think it's a load of crap...but whatever), and I sit in a cubicle 9 hours a day. I can't think of anything more interesting to write right now, but I'll be back. Don't you worry.